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I thought I had a job. Thought being the operative word here.

Last week I call a couple places - including one a couple of blocks away. It was that one that called me in for an interview and basically wanted to hire me on the spot. I wasn't sure how I felt, I'd need to do 1099 and no workman's comp or stuff, but at this point, it was close and a job is a job.

We agreed that I would start today, 9 A.M. So at 8:50, I show up bright and bushy-tailed as I can get at 8:50 in the morning. Two customers are being helped and then they leave. He looks at me and I know something is up. He asked if I had gotten is message this weekend or heard the phone ring this morning. I'm like, Nope, what's up? Turns out another girl called after I accepted the job that has more experience with said job, beyond what I could offer, as I would possibly training on certain parts. Needless to say, I was freaking disappointed. WTF, man, couldn't you have called Thursday or Friday during the day? Sunday? Oh yeah, I forgot, Sunday is your bloody ass-kissing day of rest, and far be it from me that you actually have the balls to call the person you told had a job to tell them, no you found someone with more experience and now I'm in the lurch.

FUCKER. There. Yes, I'm upset. I think with good right.

This now makes me feel like the least marketable person on planet earth, though I know that's not true. Not all emotions are quite rational, but I need to get up off my ass and make myself marketable. It might eat my time, I might not get to be as social as I'd like - which oddly adds to my anxiety rather than helping it. I worry about what I might miss. What ground-breaking or earth-shattering social event, meeting, or what not might happen and I'm stuck at work or doing homework. But I know this will make life better, that I'll be a better person and eventually a more financially stable person, even if socially fucked.

Here is my rock. I shall cuddle it rather than hide under it and brain the next motherfucker that doesn't take the time to actually tell me they found a "better offer". And I want to cancel Christmas. I'm not feeling jolly and I'm certainly not feeling good-will at that dick for brains, worthless, monkey-licking, couch-felching, deist-fellating copraphasiac.

And how was your day?

P.S. Thanks to Tet and Gary for all the times that you've said strange words at me and talked about nasty habits so I could properly give words to how I feel about the guy that would have been my boss.

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November 2013

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